This is the most tiring, brain frazzling, difficult time of the adoption process in my humble opinion. It's difficult to explain to any one who hasn't 'been there, done that' but I shall try just in case.
In our case as Little Bear was only 17 months old it was decided a week for introductions would be enough unless it was decided otherwise during the process. During that week we stayed at our friend's house (as by now we had moved to theological college) as we needed to be near to our son's foster carer. The week went as follows: Tuesday-Friday we went to foster carer's home in time for Little Bear waking at 7am and were there playing and observing his routine until bedtime at 7pm. On the Saturday we took Little Bear out alone, we went to the sea life centre and he used the pushchair that we had bought for him, and the car seat in the back of our car (Yes! A car seat in the back of our car). He was wearing a snowsuit which the foster carer had bought for him and we giggled because he looked like Maggie Simpson in this photo:
We went home after we had delivered him back to the foster carers, he waved and smiled at us as we pulled away and I shed a few tears leaving that day. I was being silly because on the Monday he came and spent the day at our house, the foster carers went and left him with us and we put him to bed for his nap in his cot in our room...and he slept!
On the Tuesday we went to collect him to bring him home. Our social worker had warned us that goodbyes were very emotional, 8 members of the extended family had turned out to say goodbye to Little Bear. There were lots of tears although Little Bear remained amazingly quiet throughout. We got him home and had an afternoon with the new toys we had bought and some familiar stuff he had brought with him. Then he went to bed in his new cot in our room and went to sleep without a fuss. We sat downstairs that night amazed and emotional.
We have a son!
We adopted our son in April - He was 9 months. we are also at theological college - My Husband gets ordained in May! It's great that you shared your experience and it has been helpful for me...Thanks
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on your adoption! All the best with the forthcoming move and the ordination.
ReplyDeleteSo exciting for me to hear of someone else who adopted in our position, we certainly were a first at my husband's college!