Planning to plan...

Anyone who knows me well will testify that I am not known for my organisation. I don't plan in advance, I rarely use a diary and I fly by the seat of my pants most of the time.

At school I was always the one who arrived without the ingredients for Home Economics, or without the homework because I had genuinely forgotten it. In fact I was so disorganised, on one occasion I admitted to having completely forgotten the homework, received a detention, and then during the detention the teacher who set the homework came in and told me that I had not been in school on the day it was set! A typical example really.

I haven't got any better since school, I worked in a job which followed a particular pattern each week and so I could manage that with no major difficulties, a preschooler at home doesn't require an organised Mummy luckily, just one who feeds him, cares for him and plays with him.

When my son started school I unravelled a little, as now I am required to provide all the necessary deitrus a child is required to take to school. It also helps if I read the endless mailouts from school and respond immediately otherwise they are long forgotten.

In contrast, this morning I attended the second meeting to plan a service with our Churches Together. This service will take place in one month's time. The service is all ready prepared and booklets containing all the information one could possibly need to create a service of distinction is included. Now after two meetings we have covered every possible eventuality and just have a meeting after the service where we will debrief, to look forward to!

My husband's only comment on this feat of organisation was "You can tell this service isn't clergy led, we would turn up and say who's doing what then?"

Are you taking the mickey?

I'm into banter, I like good hearted friendly teasing, I relish the opportunity to find a joke! That's me.

When I was a child I was so insecure that the accusation 'you can't take a joke' was often levelled at me, along with being reprimanded for 'smart' remarks. Not a good combination. I learned to give as good as I get and am quite happy to be the butt of friend's joke as long as they know they will receive the same treatment, anyone who knows me will testify that I do just that! The longer you have known me the more ammunition you have stored!

It is a sign of friendship for me, a good-natured ribbing, I only tease when I am on safe ground, when I know the person well enough that I can be sure it will be taken well, and when the person concerned knows me we enough to recognise the joke. I make witty (or at least they amuse me) asides and often my humour is self-depracating, and when I use the latter I am not looking for sympathy - just a giggle.

I tend to be drawn to that kind of person, one who can take a joke and return it ten-fold. They become my closest friends - you know who you are... This kind of ability not to take oneself too seriously is an amazing thing as far as I am concerned, and understandably only shared within the closeness of friendship, it makes a person vulnerable.

When I am cross or disapproving, I try not to speak at all. There will be no sarcasm because once I have started I can't stop and it will hurt. If I get on with a person and understand them and that feeling is mutual then the jokes are shared as naturally as the rest of the conversation. If this is not the case I am as clear as I can be, there is no room for humourous asides which may be misconstrued or only funny to one party.

You see, the thing is, my kind of humour has to be shared through mutual respect. Otherwise witty becomes rude, teasing becomes bullying, and people become hurt and that is in no way funny.

NB:Many thanks to Dave Walker for the use of the Cartoon :-)