Thursday, 20 January 2011
Are you taking the mickey?
When I was a child I was so insecure that the accusation 'you can't take a joke' was often levelled at me, along with being reprimanded for 'smart' remarks. Not a good combination. I learned to give as good as I get and am quite happy to be the butt of friend's joke as long as they know they will receive the same treatment, anyone who knows me will testify that I do just that! The longer you have known me the more ammunition you have stored!
It is a sign of friendship for me, a good-natured ribbing, I only tease when I am on safe ground, when I know the person well enough that I can be sure it will be taken well, and when the person concerned knows me we enough to recognise the joke. I make witty (or at least they amuse me) asides and often my humour is self-depracating, and when I use the latter I am not looking for sympathy - just a giggle.
I tend to be drawn to that kind of person, one who can take a joke and return it ten-fold. They become my closest friends - you know who you are... This kind of ability not to take oneself too seriously is an amazing thing as far as I am concerned, and understandably only shared within the closeness of friendship, it makes a person vulnerable.
When I am cross or disapproving, I try not to speak at all. There will be no sarcasm because once I have started I can't stop and it will hurt. If I get on with a person and understand them and that feeling is mutual then the jokes are shared as naturally as the rest of the conversation. If this is not the case I am as clear as I can be, there is no room for humourous asides which may be misconstrued or only funny to one party.
You see, the thing is, my kind of humour has to be shared through mutual respect. Otherwise witty becomes rude, teasing becomes bullying, and people become hurt and that is in no way funny.
NB:Many thanks to Dave Walker for the use of the Cartoon :-)