Monday, 28 February 2011

Do not worry.

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6: 34
I don't know about you but for a natural born worrier like me, this is a very comforting verse.

When I was in senior school I had a very scary maths teacher. The scariest of scary kids were a little nervous of her, so it is unsurprising that an overgrown mouse like me would be nervous. Although my mathematics ability was negligible (and still is), I was placed in the top maths group in Year 11 which Mrs Scary, from Scary-land taught.

Each night before a maths lesson, after I had spent the evening struggling with the homework, I would toss and turn in my bed worrying about facing Mrs Scary the following day. I finally realised one night that tomorrow would come whatever I did and thought up a mantra. "In my bed, under my duvet, she can't get me here." Which I would repeat until I feel asleep.

The lesson, would nearly always go better than I thought. Normally because I could 'borrow' the homework in morning break from some sympathetic (and mathematically gifted) friends. However the proof of all this 'borrowing' came in GCSE results. I got a D. Then to add insult to injury, Mrs Scary was my teacher up until I retook the exam the following summer and achieved my longed for C grade.

There is very little point worrying about things that are beyond our control. It doesn't mean it is easy to stop worrying about them, that is the frailty of our human nature but as long as we retain some perspective. Mrs Scary, bashed my confidence, made me too afraid to seek help when I was struggling but ultimately she helped me achieve my Maths C grade, not least because I was damn sure I would not spend any more time in her classes!

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